A new business was opening and one of the owner's friends wanted to send him flowers for the occasion.
They arrived at the new business site and the owner read the card,
"Rest in Place."
The owner was angry and called the florist to complain.
After he had told the florist of the obvious mitake
and how angry he was ,
the florist replied,
"Sir,I am really sorry for the mistake,
but rather than getting angry,
you should imagine this :
somewhere there is a funeral taking place today,
and they have flowers with a note saying,
‘Congratulations on your new location' "
Johnny had been misbehaving and was sent to his room .
After a while emerged and informed his mother that he had thought over and then said a prayer .
"Fine",said the pleased mother.
"If you ask God to help you not misbehave,He will help you."
"Oh,I didn't ask Him to help me not misbehave,"said Johnny.
"I asked him to help you put up with me."
Our supermarket had a sald on boneless chicken breasts,and a woman I know ontended to stock up .
At the store,However,she was disappointed to find only a few skimpy prepackaged portopns of the poultry,
so she complained to the butcher.
"don't worry,lady," he said.
"I will pack some more trays and have them ready for you by the time you finish shopping."
Several aisles later ,my friend heard the butcher's voice boom over th public-address system:
"Will the lady who wanted bigger breasts please meet me at the back of the store?"