精选爆笑英语笑话笑死人

时间:2018-02-22 英语笑话 我要投稿

  笑一笑,十年少,看一些笑话能愉悦我们的心情,今天我们就一起来看看精选爆笑英语笑话笑死人吧!

  精选爆笑英语笑话笑死人(一)

  Two Soldiers

  Two soldiers were in camp. The first one‘s name was George, and the second one‘s name was Bill. George said, "have you got a piece of paper and an envelope, Bill?"

  Bill said, "Yes, I have," and he gave them to him.

  Then George said, "Now I haven‘t got a pen." Bill gave him his, and George wrote his letter. Then he put it in the envelope and said, "have you got a stamp, Bill?" Bill gave him one.

  Then Bill got up and went to the door, so George said to him, "Are you going out?"

  Bill Said, "Yes, I am," and he opened the door.

  George said, "Please put my letter in the box in the office, and..." He stopped.

  "What do you want now?" Bill said to him.

  George looked at the envelope of his letter and answered, "What‘s your girl-friend‘s address?"

  军营里有二名士兵,一个叫乔治,一个叫比尔。乔治问:“比尔,你有信纸、信封吗?”

  比尔说:“有。”然后把信纸和信封给了乔治。

  乔治又说:“我还没有笔呢。”比尔又把自己的笔给了他短篇英语小故事大全短篇英语励志小故事大全。乔治开始写信。写完后把信放进信封里,又问:“比尔,你有邮票吗?”比尔给了他一张。

  这时比尔站起来,向门口走去。乔治问:“你要出去吗?”

  比尔说:“是的。”随即打开了门。

  乔治说:“请帮我把这封信投进办公室的信箱里,还有...”他停住了。

  “你还要什么?”比尔问乔治看着信封说:“你女朋友的地址是-?”

  精选爆笑英语笑话笑死人(二)

  I’m not ripe yet

  Two jokes about madmen,There were two lunatics escaped from the insane asylum, one wearing red and another wearing green .they run and run,then climbed to a tree up. After a while , the red one jumped off the tree, then raised his head on up there, said: "Hey, ah, how do you not down?

  The green one answered “No,no I’m not ripe yet”.

  我还没熟

  有两个神经病患者,一个红衣一个绿衣,从病院里逃出来。 两人跑啊跑,后来爬到一棵树上。 一会儿,其中红衣的人从树上跳下来,滚啊滚的。 然后抬起头对上面的人说:「喂~~你怎么还不下来啊? 上面的那个人回答他:「不行啊!我还没有熟......」

  精选爆笑英语笑话笑死人(三)

  Five Months Older

  The Second World War had begun, and John wanted to join the army, but he was only 16 years old, and boys were allowed to join only if they were over 18. So when the army doctor examined him, he said that he was 18.

  But John‘s brother had joined the army a few days before, and the same doctor had examined him too. This doctor remembered the older boy‘s family name, so when he saw John‘s papers, he was surprised.

  "How old are you?" he said.

  "Eighteen, sir," said John.

  "But your brother was eighteen, too," said the doctor. "Are you twins?"

  "Oh, no, sir," said John, and his face went red. "My brother is five months older than I am."

  大五个月

  第二次世界大战开始了,约翰想参军,可他只有十六岁,当时规定男孩到十八岁才能入伍。所以军医给他进行体检时,他说他已经十八岁了。

  可约翰的哥哥刚入伍没几天,而且也是这个军医给他做的检查。这位医生还记得他哥哥的姓。所以当他看到约翰的表格时,感到非常惊奇。

  “你多大了?”军医问。

  “十八,长官。”约翰说。

  “可你的哥哥也是十八岁,你们是双胞胎吗?”

  约翰脸红了,说:“哦,不是,长官,我哥哥比我大五个月。”

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