a doctor came into the hospital ward and said to mr. johnson, "i have some good news and some bad news for you."
then mr. johnson said, "please, give me the good news first."
so the doctor said, "the doctors here are going to name an incurable disease after you."
when a group of women got on the car, every seat was already occupied. the conductor noticed a man who seemed to be asleep, and fearing he might miss his stop, he nudged(用肘轻推) him and said: "wake up, sir!"
"i wasn't asleep," the man answered.
"not asleep? but you had your eyes closed."
"i know. i just hate to look at ladies standing up beside me in a crowded car."
traveler: can i catch the three o'clock train to toronto?
ticket agent: that depends on how fast you can run. it left fifteen minutes ago.