英语笑话_笑话网

英语笑话

英语笑话是指以一句英文短语或一个英文故事让说话者和听者之间觉得好笑,或是产生幽默感,笑话是一种经过艺术加工的语言形式,是艺术化的语言,笑话是一种艺术方法,用这种方法造成以笑为艺术手段的文学艺术作品。幽默寓于笑话之中,它是笑话的精料,智慧之所在。笑话是幽默的载体,一个成功的笑话能流传千古,听者和讲者都会感到快乐、欣喜,拍掌叫好!
英语笑话

1英语笑话短文

1、The Fish Net

Can you tell me what fish net is made, Ann?

A lot of little holes tied together with strings. replied the little girl.

鱼网

你能告诉我鱼网是什么做的吗,安? 老师发问道。

把许多小孔用绳子栓在一起就成了鱼网了。 小女孩回答道。

2、The New Teacher

George comes from school on the first of September.

George, how did you like your new teacher? asked his mother.

I didn't like her, Mother, because she said that three and three were six and then she said that two and four were six too.....

新老师

9月1日, 乔治放学回到家里。

乔治,你喜欢你们的新老师吗? 妈妈问。

妈妈,我不喜欢,因为她说3加3得6, 可后来又说2加4也得6。

2英语笑话带翻译

《律师、宝马和胳膊》

一个律师打开他的宝马车门,突然一辆汽车驶过来把门撞飞了,警察赶到现场,律师正痛苦地抱怨毁坏了他心爱的宝马。

“警察同志,看看他们把我的车弄的!!!”律师哀怨地说。

“你们律师真是物质至上,我很不舒服!”警察反驳说,“你这么关心你可恶的宝马,你可能没有注意到你的左胳膊也没了。”

律师终于注意到了血淋淋的左肩膀,“天哪,我的劳力士手表在哪儿?”

A lawyer opened the door of his BMW, when suddenly a car came along and hit the door, ripping it off completely. When the police arrived at the scene, the lawyer was complaining bitterly about the damage to his precious BMW.

"Officer, look what they've done to my Beeeemer!!!", he whined.

"You lawyers are so materialistic, you make me sick!!!" retorted the officer, "You're so worried about your stupid BMW, that you didn't even notice that your left arm was ripped off!!!"

《狗住旅店》

一个人给一家他计划在假期里停留的小旅馆写了封信,“我非常希望带着我的狗,它很干净很有教养,你能允许它和我睡一间屋子吗?”

旅馆主人立即回了封信,“我经营旅馆很多年了,狗从没偷过毛巾,床单, 餐具,或者墙上的画。我也从没有在半夜因为狗喝醉胡闹而赶走它,狗也从不不付帐就跑掉。实际上我们非常欢迎您的狗来我们旅馆,如果它为您担保,也欢迎您来。

A man wrote a letter to a small hotel he planned to visit on his vacation: "I would very much like to bring my dog with me. He is well-groomed and very well behaved. Would you be willing to permit me to keep him in my room with me at night?"

An immediate reply came from the hotel owner, who said, "I've been operating this hotel for many years. In all that time, I've never had a dog steal towels, bedclothes, silverware or pictures off the walls. I've never had to evict a dog in the middle of the night for being drunk and disorderly. And I've never had a dog run out on a hotel bill. Yes, indeed, your dog is welcome at my hotel. And, if your dog will vouch for you, you're welcome to stay here, too."

发布时间:2017-12-14英语搞笑笑话十篇

多阅读一些有趣的英语笑话,能激起我们阅读英语的兴趣,从而提高英语的阅读能力,今天小编在这里为大家分享英语搞笑笑话10篇,欢迎大家阅读! 英语搞笑笑话篇一 An Absent Minded ProfessorA notoriously absentminde...

发布时间:2017-12-11关于幽默笑话的英语文章

Four best friends met at the hospital since their wives were giving births to their babies. The nurse comes up to the first man and says, Congratulations, you got twins. The man said How strange, Im t...

发布时间:2017-12-11猴子捞月儿童英语笑话故事

One day,a little monkey is playing by the well.一天,有只小猴子在井边玩儿。 He looks in the well and shouts,“Oh!My god!The moon has fallen into the well!”它往井里一瞧,高喊道:“噢!我的天!月亮掉到...

发布时间:2017-12-10一分钟英语幽默笑话

A man goes to church and starts talking to God. He says: God, what is a million dollars to you? and God says: A penny, then the man says: God, what is a million years to you? and God says: a second, t...

发布时间:2017-12-10关于电话的英语笑话

What a big deal A young businessman had just started his business, and rented a beautiful office. Sitting there, he saw a man come into the outer office. Wishing to appear busy, the businessman picked...

发布时间:2017-12-10关于终身保修的英语幽默笑话

After burying his mother nine months earlier, a client of the local mortuary finally had enough money to purchase the expensive coffin hed originally wanted. So we exhumed the body and transferred his...

发布时间:2017-12-09袋鼠的能力英语笑话

The ability of the Kangaroo The zoo built a special eight-foot-high enclosure for its newly acquired kangaroo, but the next morning the animal was found hopping around outside. The height of the fence...

发布时间:2017-12-09英语幽默笑话Lucky Mother

A young mother believed that it was very wrong to waste any food when there were so many hungry people in the world. One evening, she was giving her small daughterher tea before putting her to bed. Fi...

发布时间:2017-12-08两则幽默英语笑话

1.two birds teacher: here are two birds, one is a swallow, the other is sparrow. now who can tell us which is which? student: i cannot point out but i know the answer. teacher: please tell us. student...

发布时间:2017-12-08只有一个警察英语幽默笑话带翻译

One day, a father and his little son were going home. At this age, the boy was interested in all kinds of things and was always asking questions. Now, he asked, Whats the meaning of the word Drunk, da...

发布时间:2017-12-07干净的杯子英语幽默笑话

joe and fred were helping to build a house in a village. the weather was very warm, there was a lot of dust everywhere, and by half past twelve, they were very thirsty, so they stopped work to have th...

发布时间:2017-12-07听笑话,学地道英语

1月21日,网校人气讲师Sue和主持人Ross一起为大家奉上了一场精彩新颖的英语公开课【鲜活英语之幽默英语轻松学】。公开课以英语笑话为素材,为大家讲解了英语幽默文化中的“笑点”、笑话中的地道词汇短语、还请大家朗...

发布时间:2017-12-06英语笑话之醉酒幽默

Drunk One day, a father and his little son were going home. At this age, the boy was interested in all kinds of things and was always asking questions. Now, he asked, Whats the meaning of the word Dru...

发布时间:2017-12-06好孩子英语笑话

A Good Boy Little Robert asked his mother for two cents. What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday? I gave it to a poor old woman, he answered. Youre a good boy, said the mother proudly. Her...

发布时间:2017-12-06英语幽默笑话片段

In an entrance examination of a conservatory of music, a teacher asked one of the boys, What is the most important physiological quality of a musician? To be deaf, replied the boy. Nonsense! said the ...

发布时间:2017-12-05逗人一乐的英语笑话

At an exhibition of the worlds best swordsman, the third-place fencer took the stage. 在一场世界最佳击剑手表演中,排名第三的击剑手上场了。 A fly was released, and with an arc of his sword he cut the f...

发布时间:2017-12-05英语幽默经典笑话

There was once a snail who was sick and tired of his reputation for being so slow. 曾经有只蜗牛,它对自己动作慢的名声感到了厌恶和疲倦。 Hedecided to get some fast wheels to make up the difference. 他...

发布时间:2017-12-04英语笑话之愚蠢的问题

Stupid Question Dan was the doorman of a club in a big city. Everyday, thousands of people passed his door, and a lot of them stopped and asked him, Whats the time, please? After a few months, Dan sai...

发布时间:2017-12-04时间对我们俩来说都是金钱的英语笑话

As the taxi came to a screeching halt at a traffic light, 当出租车在遇到红灯急刹车时, I asked the driver, Do you agree that Time is money? 我问司机:“你同意‘时间就是金钱’这种说法吗?” Well, its a ...

发布时间:2017-12-03英语幽默笑话:我很高兴

A Sunday school teacher was telling her pupils the importance of making others glad. Now, children, said she, has anyone of you ever made someone else glad? Please, teacher, said a small boy, Ive made...