一段的英语笑话

时间：2020-11-15 08:56:56 英语笑话我要投稿

一段的英语笑话

　　一小段一小段的英语笑话你看过吗?下面yjbys小编整理的内容相信你会觉得很搞笑。

一段的英语笑话

　　Fried chicken

　　In class the teacher showed pictures of various birds. Then he asked one of the students, "What kind of bird do you like best, Jack?"

　　Jack thought a moment, then answered, "Fried chicken, sir."

　　老师在课堂上向学生们展示了各种各样的鸟的照片。然后他问其中一名学生，“杰克，你最喜欢哪种鸟儿啊?”

　　杰克想了想，回答，“炸鸡，老师。”

　　I've Just Bitten My Tongue

　　"Are we poisonous?" the young snake asked his mother.

　　"Yes, dear," she replied - "Why do you ask?"

　　"Cause I've just bitten my tongue! "

　　我刚咬破自己的舌头

　　“我们有毒吗?”一个年幼的蛇问它的母亲。

　　“是的，亲爱的，”她回答说，“你问这个干什么?”

　　“因为我刚刚咬破自己的舌头。”

　　How much English can you speak?

　　"Your Honor, I want to bring to your attention how unfair it is for my client to

　　be accused of theft. He arrived in New York City a week ago and barely knew his

　　way around. What's more, he only speaks a few words of English."

　　The judge looked at the defendant and asked, "How much English can you speak?"

　　The defendant looked up and said, "Give me your wallet!"

　　"法官先生，我的当事人被指控偷窃，这是多么不公正啊。他一周前才来到纽约，几乎不认路。

　　而且，他只会说几个英语单词。"

　　法官看了看被告，问道："你会说多少英文?"

　　被告抬起头，说："把你的钱包给我!"

　　He Won 他赢了

　　Tommy: How is your little brother, Johnny? Johnny: He is ill in bed. He hurt himself.

　　Tommy: That's too bad. How did that happen?

　　Johnny: We played who could lean furthest out of the window, and he won.

　　汤姆：约翰尼，你小弟弟好吗?

　　约翰尼：他害病卧床了。他受了伤。

　　汤姆：真糟糕，怎么回事儿?

　　约翰尼：我们做游戏，看谁能把身子探出窗外最远，他赢了。

　　Three pastors 三个牧师

　　Three pastors in the south were having lunch in a diner. One said, You know, since summer started I’ve been having trouble with bats in my loft(阁楼) and attic at church. I’ve tried everything----noise, spray, cats----nothing seems to scare them away.

　　Another said, Yes, me too. I’ve got hundreds living in my belfry(钟楼) and in the attic. I’ve been had the place fumigated(熏制) , and they still won’t go away.

　　The third said, I baptized(洗礼) all mine, and made them members of the church...haven’t seen one back since!

　　三个南部的牧师在一家小餐馆里吃午饭。其中的一个说道：“你们知道吗，自从夏天来临，我的.教堂的阁楼和顶楼就被蝙蝠骚扰，我用尽了一切办法----噪音、喷雾、猫----似乎什么都不能把它们赶走。”

　　另外一位说：“是啊，我也是。在我的钟楼和阁楼也有好几百只。我曾经请人把整个地方用烟熏消毒一遍，它们还是赶不走。”

　　第三个牧师说：“我为我那里的所有蝙蝠洗礼，让它们成为教会的一员......从此一只也没有再回来过。”

　　Three Men in a Boat

　　Three men were sitting on a park bench. The one in the middle was reading a newspaper; the others were pretending to fish. They baited imaginary hooks, cast lines and reeled in their catch.

　　A passing policeman stopped to watch the spectacle and asked the man in the middle if he knew the other two.

　　"Oh yes, " he said. "They are my friends.

　　"In that case, " warned the officer, "you'd better get them out of here!"

　　"Yes, sir, " the man replied, and he began rowing furiously.

　　三人同舟

　　三位男子在公园的长椅上坐着。中间的一个在读报纸，另外两个在假装钓鱼。他们给想象的鱼钩上鱼饵，放线，并卷线把鱼抓上来。

　　一位过路警察驻足观察了这个景象，他问中间的那个男子是否认识其他两位。

　　“喔，认识，”他说，“他们是我的朋友。”

　　“那样的话，”警察告诫说，“你最好把他们从这里弄走。”

　　“好的，警官。”那男子回答说，接着就开始疯狂般地做起划桨的动作来。

　　这有多娇生惯养啊

　　The six-year-old John was terribly spoiled(被宠坏的) . His father knew it, but his grandma doted on him. He hardly left her side. And when he wanted anything, he either cried or threw a temper tantrum(乱发脾气) . Then came his first day of school, his first day away from his grandmother's loving arms.

　　When he came home from school his grandma met him at the door.

　　Was school all right? she asked, Did you get along all right? did you cry?

　　Cry? John asked. No, I didn't cry, but the teacher did!

　　六岁的约翰娇生惯养。他的父亲知道这一点，可他的祖父母仍然宠着他。这孩子几乎寸步不离他的祖母。他想要什么不是哭，就是闹。他第一天上学才离开祖母的怀抱。

　　约翰放学了，他奶奶在门口接他并问道：学校怎么样?你过的好吗?哭了没有?

　　哭?约翰问，不，我没哭，可老师哭了。

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